Everyone in my family has killed someone
Some of us, those who have achieved significant success, have killed multiple times. I don't mean to be dramatic, but it's true. Some of us are good, some of us are bad, and some of us are just unhappy.
I'm Ernest Cunningham. Call me Ern or Ernie. I wish I could kill whoever decided that our family reunion should be held at a ski resort, but it's a little more complicated than that. Did I kill someone? Yes. Yes, he did. Who was it? Let's get started: My brother. My half-sister. My wife. My father. My mother. My sister-in-law. My uncle. My stepfather. My aunt. I do.
