Against each other

Most of us are familiar with the three basic responses associated with trauma – fight, flight or freeze. However, psychologists have identified a fourth, highly common yet poorly understood reaction: fawning. Often linked to "codependency" or "people-pleasing", it occurs when we inexplicably draw closer to a person or relationship that causes us pain, instead of distancing ourselves. The author's own journey of experience and exploration led her to understand the unhealthy behavioural patterns we adopt in trauma and struggle to break free from.